Although there's nothing in life more rewarding than having children, your world goes through a total transformation once you give birth. Your worries change, your schedule is flipped around, and, all too often, your relationship suffers. No longer do you and your partner have the spare time to spend together, much less every waking moment as you once did before little ones entered your world. Spending a quiet night in is a thing of the past and going out is more often a chore than a treat. All is not lost when it comes to maintaining romance after having children.
With some work and patience, you and your partner can get back your former intimacy. Here are a few tips, thanks in part to Love Panky to help you reignite your relationship and bring the spice back to your love life.
Take Some Time for You
Yes, making time for yourself may seem counterproductive when you're working on your relationship, but this is essential to making it work for you and your partner. When you're growing your family, it's especially important that you take time for yourself. As you are quite aware, being a parent requires all of your time and can quickly drain you, which can be draining and harmful to your physical well being. Because you're always on the run—often literally if you have little ones—it's common to begin to feel as if you're constantly running on empty. This can lead to more stress, a lack of energy, and even depression.
As a result, you must take a step back and make time for yourself. Do something relaxing like yoga or take up a new hobby. Go to a quiet place and mediate or read or just spend this free moment basking in solitude. This will recharge and energize you, giving you a more positive mindset and reducing your stress, which in turn makes you less frustrated and discounted at home and with your mate.
Keep Your Partner's Needs in Mind
You spend so much time focusing on the needs of your children that it's inevitable for those of your partner to suffer. Not only does the sex decrease, but the needs of both you and your, and your relationship, fall by the wayside when you start having kids. However, you can't lose touch with your significant other or your relationship—remember, your relationship, like your family, needs some attention too. Even simple things like compliments or showing your spouse your appreciation when he or she does something nice or helpful for you can go a long way in helping you maintain a healthy romantic partnership.
Be sure to communicate with your mate as a clear line of communication is vital to keeping a relationship strong. Check in with your significant other every day—and not just to talk about your children or work. Instead, use this daily exchange to discuss personal matters, your relationship, and feelings (good and bad). Make it a point to convey the love and gratitude you have for your partner and end the conversation on a good note.
Remember the Romance
Of course you can't forget about the significance of sex when it comes to maintaining a healthy relationship. Your sex drive may have diminished after you began having babies, but this doesn't mean you no longer want to be intimate with your mate or have lost your sexual desires. In fact, you and your partner probably both need a sexual reboot, which can easily be accomplished by simply reconnecting with your mate in the bedroom.
Start by examining what things are lacking in your physical relationship. Perhaps you need to get more creative in the boudoir. Try picking up some lingerie that differs from what you normally wear or a new and unique sexual enhancement device. Items like crotchless panties and Ben Wa Balls, which Adam and Eve reports are often recommended by professionals for strengthening a woman's pubococcygeus muscles. By investing in these items, you and your partner can find new ways to turn each other on.
You should also think outside of the bedroom. This means making time out and reviving date night with an intimate dinner for two or a night at the movies. Recapture the childless period in your relationship by taking a cooking class together or go on a vineyard tour. While these activities may seem small, they will surely help you bring the passion back to your relationship. At least, that's the word from Cosmo.